Happy New Year!1

These are not all the newsworthy events happening at Subsume Technologies, but aren’t you sick of seeing tons of press releases over dumb stuff that doesn’t affect your everyday life? I mean, how much of your time has been wasted by the breathless anticipation of self-driving cars alone? We’re not going to be doing that sort of nonsense here.

  1. Technically, every day can be considered the start of a new year.2↩
  2. No, I don’t think it’s more correct to call it an anniversary, since that usually marks a significant event of a previous year.3↩
  3. You’re right; it can considered a kind of birthday. But even that implies a yearly celebration. We do hope you’ll visit our site again sooner than next year.4↩
  4. You want to call it Quantum Entanglement Day? Nerd.5↩
  5. Sorry about the “nerd” crack back there. We definitely appreciate that you think of us as part of your eigenstates in superposition rather than as an external interaction collapsing your wave function.↩